Suffering

I would like to thank you for reading my weekly emails. I am thanking you for giving me your most valuable asset ― your attention.

At 19 years of age, I was working part time as a baby sitter in Poland.

At 21, I got an internship in a small marketing company.

Since then, I'm paying my rent and I'm fully independent. I haven't asked for a penny from my mom ever since.

At 25, after 4 years of busting my ass, I was able to bring my mom to Poland and I lived with her for 2 years. The shit I went through to make it happen can't be explained. But those were the happiest days of my life. Keep in mind that I went through a lot of suffering during those 2 years of living together too. Although, the best part was that we both suffered together. It gave us strength and learning lessons.

Why am I telling you this?

Now that my mom has gone back to India temporarily, I'm working day and night to improve my money-making skills + language skills so I can become a permanent resident of Poland and be able to live in Poland or India without any worries in future.

During daytime, at my work, I am lucky enough to have a Ukrainian team mate who makes me a more skillful employee each day and she also inspired me to start learning Python. (I'm currently on Day 4 of a 100 day BootCamp. She is already on Day 12th.) When I pushed through the mental pain and finished Day 3, it showed me who I am. I might be slow at this, but I am moving forward.

For Mon, Wed, Fri and Sat evenings, I have an Indian friend who goes to gym with me. He doesn't necessarily push me harder in the gym, but he makes sure that we both somehow reach the gym 4 times a week. He always texts me to ask what time I'm coming and once we are in the gym, we've already won. We have defeated procrastination. To us, gym is a great teacher. During the last sets of exercises when our whole body is telling us to give up and when we still push through, that is when we find who we are. What we're made of.

On Tue and Thu evenings, I go to a Polish language school where the teacher only talks to us in Polish and again I'm in an uncomfortable situation. But after each 90 min lesson, me and one of my Tunisian friend take a walk to the metro and we talk only in Polish to each other.

The key is to either be alone or find people better than you at what you wanna be good at or at least have the same passion to improve.

A lot of people either do not work hard or they say 'When I'll find my purpose, then I'll work hard.'

You have to go through mental and physical pain everyday regardless of what's happening in your life. I'm now so attached to suffering that an easy day where I don't train my mind and body, feels like a complete waste of time.

Here's a graph I think about a lot:

If you do not program your mind for suffering, it will automatically be programmed to remain a pussy!

That's all from me this week.

© 2023 Kunal Dutt.